Whats the worst thing your coach has ever said to you (or a team-mate)?

[SaberWolf]

I've seen this thread at other websites and its pretty cool if you get alot of people. My coach can get pretty mad if we're losing, and in the middle of a game, our coach yelled to one of our kids:

"Bence, you moron, you could f**k up a wet-dream."

And we were all just standing there like and then we all BUST out laughing. Classic moment, our coach got thrown-out by the way.

[Dado_Prso_09]

My couch told one of my kids to go home once when he missed a break away and he did my couch was a nut case tho

[SaberWolf]

So is mine! I don't know how much he's cost our school when he gets thrown out the game its like $100 every game he gets thrown out of...

[Ivan7637]

I ahd this asian on my team and we were running like 10 laps around the soccer field and me and him were the front ones running and the asian(name is luan) got tired and stopped running for good. Coach told him to run but he refused so the coach said...

"You Asian Piece of Shit, Get the ***k off my Field"

Luan walked away pissed off and got the coach fired the next day, if he told me something like that i would have attacked his ass.

It was funny because our coach was asian too lol.

[Maxpayne]

Lol dude now that's.. LOL! is the dumbest thing i ever heard !

[nachi88]

Our gymnasium had only one coach for all games till the 8th grade.This coach of ours was a hammer throw expert, but was coaching us in all games So, we were playing against B.V Gymnasium, traditional rivals, ( I dont know why), and one of my team mates mised a very easy chance which was a 1-1 against the goalie. My coach was extremely angry, and punched him at half time, and suprisingly the remedy worked, and my team mate scored a goal a little later on. But we lost the match.

This is one of the reasons why Germany doesnt produce many great forwards these days... people are too scared to play upfront and miss

[deathskinbeer]

one of my old coaches (when i was like 6) got mad and started throwing all the parents lawn chairs onto the field

[SiN]

lol my under 16's coach once sed ages ago....

u look like a bunch of girly poofs prancing around the feild having a tea party...get ur fingas out of ur asses and play sum real football or else ill have to go get sum little tootoos for uz....LOL

[Mirko Mandic]

i had a realy dumb coach at skool in yr7 he told the team "ok i want u all to push up wen we atack and then i want a OFF-SIDe TRAP WEN WE DEFEND" (well the problem was our 2 backs were like over 60kilos in like yr7 and couldnt run 1/2 lap)
so wen the oppossion break through and score (i was put keeper :S i play up front or attackive mid) he goes physco yelling " whats wrong with u Alfio (6okg kid) cant u catch that winger(he was fast kid not even our fastest player WHO IS VERY FAST couldnt catch up tp him) ??? huh and you MIRKO WHAT TYPE OF GOALKEEPING IS THAT?????" SO I REPLY "AM I A KEEPER????? YOU SH!T FOR BRAINS IDIOT???? WHAT TYPE OF COACHING IS THIS!!!!!! YOU ASK KIDS WHO CANT RUN TO FORM OFF-SIDE TRAP!!!!"

WELL I NEVER STARTED A MATCH AGAIN acctualy he had big grudge against me i played like 90min total in last 5games.

[RaulMadrid7]

On my highschool team, I play forward but get benched most of the time cause of this arrogant kid who looks faster than me and is about 5"4 when I'm 5"11, anyways he hardly ever scores, he just acts like he is so good and always blames the other guys for the "poor" assists.

So I decided to play centre midfield since that a$$hole always convinced the coach he was the best striker. We were playing a match against another school one day and I was playing right behind him as a centre mid while he was as ussual standing infront waiting for a pass without helping anyone in defence or pressuring the other team. We were into the first half when our right winger crossed a beautiful ball into the box after all his hard working crossing 3 defenders, and that asshole striker (which his name is Kyle by the way so I can refer to him) goes for a "bicycle kick" (more like a retarded plunge for death) and misses the ball for many obvious reasons that he sucks.

Here is the part that pisses me off, after all that, in the second half we were tied 2-2 (I scored 1 goal by the way ) and I was rushing down the field on a breakaway when this idiot Kyle comes out of nowhere and grabs the ball out of my feet, then he loses the ball and gets "fouled", I started complaining with him asking him why he did that, he looks at me and says, "Shut the **** up, start talking when you can give me a proper ball." At that moment, I forgot what the word red card means, and punched him in the face and we started fighting ont he field. After the game where it was tied 2-2, the coach called the whole team for a "meeting", he started talking about how we could have won that match... blah...blah...blah... and then he said, "For our next game let's try and give a descent ball to Kyle okay guys?"

That was when we all knew that if this coach was coaching the soccer team next year, no one would join.

[Sergei]

When 15, I play football with Ygor back home in Moscow. I score 4 goal in game. Ygor miss two penalty and trip over own foot.

I start bench next game. I call coach Hairy Baboon. He call me Mariah Carey

[Maxpayne]

LOL this is a dumb joke but i LOVE it! Good one !

[RaulMadrid7]

Originally Posted by Sergei

When 15, I play football with Ygor back home in Moscow. I score 4 goal in game. Ygor miss two penalty and trip over own foot.

I start bench next game. I call coach Hairy Baboon. He call me Mariah Carey

Wow, that was actually pretty funny....

[Ivan7637]

Originally Posted by Sergei

When 15, I play football with Ygor back home in Moscow. I score 4 goal in game. Ygor miss two penalty and trip over own foot.

I start bench next game. I call coach Hairy Baboon. He call me Mariah Carey

dude your hilarious. hahahah mariah carey hahaha

[Maxpayne]

Raul finnally yuo changed your siigys .. nice ones mate